i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
