careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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