i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
