All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
