i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
