I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize