I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
