soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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