She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
