found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize