She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
