That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Just cropdusted the office
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Randomize
