Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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