Me too!
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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