just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
My pussy is not your playground.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
