Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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