That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize