Texts From Last Night

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  (416): View more from Ontario

  Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.

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  (416): Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be. http://tfl.nu/wari
  Replies (5) Good night (551) Bad night (2774) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.

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  (317): Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper. http://tfl.nu/3ucb
  Replies (16) Good night (5384) Bad night (828) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.

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  (443): dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though. http://tfl.nu/36m5
  Replies (27) Good night (6584) Bad night (973)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Did u at least say sorry?

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  (732): I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet. (908): Did u at least say sorry? http://tfl.nu/m6e4
  Replies (44) Good night (1009) Bad night (8131)
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  (323): View more from California

  Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.

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  (323): Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy. http://tfl.nu/58l0
  Replies (6) Good night (3423) Bad night (666) Order T-Shirt
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  As in ill only blow him next week

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  (403): I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow (403): As in ill only blow him next week http://tfl.nu/dd9t
  Replies (14) Good night (3038) Bad night (821)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  Thanks, mom.

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  (513): Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection! (1-513): Thanks, mom. http://tfl.nu/k49b
  Replies (17) Good night (3909) Bad night (1079) Order T-Shirt
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.

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  (828): and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY. http://tfl.nu/xi75
  Replies (9) Good night (1811) Bad night (547) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.

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  (608): Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship. http://tfl.nu/pyi6
  Replies (6) Good night (1351) Bad night (466) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.

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  (914): Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again. http://tfl.nu/ajpy
  Replies (4) Good night (611) Bad night (881) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.

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  (541): Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic. http://tfl.nu/b3rt
  Replies (1) Good night (739) Bad night (380) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women

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  (415): You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women http://tfl.nu/rghq
  Replies (2) Good night (588) Bad night (406) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.

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  (608): We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you. http://tfl.nu/0tab
  Replies (7) Good night (1072) Bad night (299)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.

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  (561): I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished. http://tfl.nu/wm2d
  Replies (1) Good night (966) Bad night (214) Order T-Shirt
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  (646): View more from New York

  I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!

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  (646): I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me! http://tfl.nu/zxm1
  Replies (6) Good night (376) Bad night (375)

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