she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
