WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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