She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
