I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
