why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
