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YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
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