Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Randomize
