her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
