just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
