It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
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As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
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It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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