were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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