Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
