i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
The uberlube is also flammable
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize