so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
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I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
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i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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