new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.