...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
