I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
