Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
