1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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