Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Randomize