You smell like a Billy Joel song
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
