THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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