is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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