I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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