Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
