THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
