the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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