I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
