Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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