just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize