I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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