sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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