What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Randomize