I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
